Frozen Food Tasting

My sister works at a trendy chain grocery store whose products she worships even though most of them are mass-produced in facilities at the opposite end of the country. The other day I went to pick her up from work but arrived a few minutes early. While she was in the break room retrieving her things, another employee was preparing an array of new products for the employees to sample. Each of the three products was a frozen meal that had been heated and portioned into small sample cups for everyone to try. Since I'm not one to pass on free food, I examined the three different options: a salmon noodle casserole, some sort of beef stroganoff concoction, and chicken in gravy sauce or something.

I stood behind a flock of contemplative employees, carefully reading each of the food descriptions. I then glanced up to see an older man with a goatee stroke his chin, deeply considering the flavor profiles of the no doubt lukewarm, rubbery beef bits he was chewing. I had originally intended to sample the food item that I believed could best retain its flavor and texture after being manufactured, frozen and microwaved. In the end I opted for the most exotic sounding fare: the salmon noodle thing. It was only a few bites worth of food so what could it possibly do to me?

As I brought the first forkful to my lips, the fickle smell of poorly prepared salmon wafted up my nose and I immediately second guess my choice. I love salmon, but somehow I felt as though this noodle mixture was degrading to salmon everywhere. I shrugged and took the first bite. There was no second bite. It was wonderfully flavorless and boring just like something manufactured with as little care or culinary effort should. It tasted like a day old tuna sandwich that had been forgotten in a school backpack. I had to stifle a laugh as my sister asked me what I thought:

"Meh, it's frozen food."

I couldn't lie, but will the employees have to?

Weird Fungus

I'm sorry to resume my blog with a less than profound post. I wish I could say my online absence has been due to an intense intellectual awakening that I could not fully articulate in a blog post until now. Sadly, I have nothing philosophical or mind-blowing to say, but I have some cool pictures of fungus!

I am working on a collection project for my mycology class and the coolest thing I've found so far reminded me an awful lot of tripe a.k.a. the stomach lining of various farm animals. Tripe is actually considered a delicacy but I don't think I could ever stomach that stuff (see what I did there??) This white jelly fungus I found was growing on a decaying tree. After drying it in the oven it turned a dark brown color. Pretty neat! Hope the fumes aren't slowly poisoning myself and my roommates.

Before drying

After Drying

Envelope Art

I've never been good at drawing, so I've had to hone in on other talents. I love writing letters to friends and family since it's a very personal and meaningful way of staying in touch. Probably about seventy percent of the things I say are meant with a sarcastic or comical overtone, and I have started channeling that into how I decorate the envelopes. It's fun and easy and if I run out of stuff to say in a letter I just put more stickers on the envelope so the recipient has more to look at. It's really worked out quite well and it makes writing letters even more fun!

Possible Demon Sighting

It seemed liked another cheerful summer's day. The birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and many neighborhood residents were enjoying a casual stroll or leisurely bike ride. I might have even had a little extra pep in my step as I breathed in the warm air, anticipating a delicious lunch as I approached my apartment. Just then, as I turned at the corner of Euclid and Ackerman, I saw a ghastly sight. What was clearly a shriveled, mummified hand was strewn across the sidewalk as if someone had carelessly dropped it on their way to the grocery store. Obviously my first questions were what supernatural being that hand belonged to and if it had crawled here on its own. If the hand was still living apart from its demon body, was I at risk of being suddenly attacked and sacrificed to the demon overlord? I started to panic and snapped a quick photo as proof before crossing the street and hastily continuing my journey home. I peered back for a quick second and I could have sworn I saw those gnarled black fingers twitch.

A Proper Breakfast

Sometimes I have to be creative with my omelette making when I forget to add vegetables until after I've folded the omelette over. Spinach and cheese omelettes are my go-to, and more often than not the spinach ends up on the side as a garnish. No matter, I just call it a deconstructed omelette and carry on like nothing went wrong. Added bonus, the plops of sauteed spinach and salsa on the plate make for a nice presentation.

The Presentation

The Assembly

Zucchini Snack

I'm not a chef, but sometimes it's fun to pretend. The other night I made this tasty dish with a zucchini purchased from a small farmer's market down the street. All I did was cut it in slices and sauteed it with some olive oil. In another pan I sauteed chopped onion and garlic to garnish the zucchini. I added a sprinkle of parmesan cheese for a savory flare and voila!

Have it as a side or as the main course!
Depends on how hungry you are...

Sensational Sangria

Several years ago I had my first taste of sangria at a Peruvian restaurant in New York City. I immediately fell in love with this dangerously delightful fruity beverage. It was a spicy and sweet concoction that mesmerized me with a secret potency I could not detect until I was falling sideways in the restaurant booth. Over a week ago I decided to make my own sangria with a very simple recipe since I only had a few ingredients on hand:

1/4 cup Sugar
1/2 Thinly Sliced Orange
1 bottle 750-ml Red Wine
A splash of brandy

Make the sangria on a night you're making red sauce. Pour some of the wine into the sauce. Pour the rest into a mason jar and add remaining ingredients. Shake it up to combine ingredients. Forget about it and leave it sitting in the fridge for a week. Open it up and pour yourself a refreshing glass of fruity deliciousness.

Side note: My version is pretty potent. Add water if needed. The key thing is to let it sit at least over night whenever possible. If you give the flavors some time to merry, you will be rewarded with a phenomenal batch of sangria.

The jar was full before pouring two glasses