Elizabethan Insults

I was going through old folders from high school today, trying to clear out some junk that I really have no use for. That's when I came across this hilarious list of old school insults. My English teacher was preparing us to begin reading a Shakespeare piece, and included this list to ease our tensions about delving into such heavy material. The print quality is spotty, so I retyped it rather than trying to scan the original:

Find yourself tempted to say f--- and damn too often? The Elizabethan equivalents are much more fun and don't make parents with children glare at you in restaurants. You could say fie or you could swear by God's teeth or wounds
Combine one word from each of the three columns below, prefaced with "Thou...":

artless                          basecourting                 apple-john

bawdy                          bat-fowling                    baggage

beslubbering              beef-witted                    barnacle

bootless                      beetled-headed             bladder

churlish                       boil-brained                   boar-pig

cockered                     clapper-clawed              bugbear

clouted                        clay-brained                  bum-bailey

craven                         common-kissing           canker-blossom

currish                        crook-pated                   clack-dish

dankish                       dismal-dreaming          clotpole

dissembling               dizzy-eyed                      coxcomb

droning                       doghearted                    codpiece

errant                          dread-bolted                 death-token

fawning                       earth-vexing                  dewberry

fobbing                       elf-skinned                     flap-dragon
froward                      fat-kidneyed                   flax-wench
frothy                         fen-sucked                      flirt-gill
gleeking                     flap-mouthed                 foot-licker
goatish                       fly-bitten                         fustilarian
gorbellied                  folly-fallen                      giglet
impertinent               fool-born                        gudgeon
infection                     full-gorged                     haggard
jarring                        guts-griping                   harpy
loggerheaded            half-faced                        hedge-pig
lumpish                     hasty-witted                   horn-beast
mammering              hedge-born                     hugger-mugger
mangled                    hell-hated                        jolthead
mewling                    idle-headed                     lewdster
paunchy                    ill-breeding                     lout
pribbling                  ill-nurtured                     maggot-pie
puking                      knotty-pated                   malt-worm
puny                          milk-livered                    mammet
qualing                     motley-minded               measle
rank                          onion-eyed                      minnow
reeky                        plume-plucked               miscreant
roguish                    pottle-deep                      moldwarp
ruttish                     pox-marked                     mummble-news
saucy                        reeling-ripe                     nut-hook
spleeny                    rough-hewn                    pigeon-egg
spongy                     rude-growing                 pignut
surly                        rump-fed                         puttock
tottering                 shard-borne                    pumpion
unmuzzled              sheep-biting                   ratsbane
vain                         spur-galled                      scut

Your insult vocabulary just increased tremendously. Try having an insult battle now, thou bootless motley-minded hugger-mugger!